Have you ever felt as if your sins were the worst in the world? As humans, we have an innate need to be the best, it’s what drives athletes to perform well, it’s what drives companies to outgrow other companies, it’s what drives employees to do their best in order to be promoted over another. Unfortunately, this drive also creeps into our own sinfulness. We even like to think that we are the best sinners, as well. “Lord, I am the worst! How could you ever forgive me, Lord?! I can never tell anyone about this because it is so embarrassing!”
In our reading from the letter of St. Paul to the Romans, however, the Apostle to the Gentiles comforts us with the words, “For there is no distinction; all have sinned and are deprived of the glory of God.” We are all sinners. We have lost God’s grace in our lives through some action against his law; however, we are also all open to his loving mercy and embrace. St. Paul continues, “They are justified freely by his grace through the redemption in Christ Jesus…” We are sinners but we are all freely justified by the grace of God through the passion, death, and resurrection of Christ.
Certainly, we should feel guilty about our sins; we have offended God. But our guilt should never be so heavy that it keeps us away from the love and mercy of God. If anything, our sinfulness should remind us of the love of God. St. Paul murdered Christians, St. Peter denied Jesus three times, and St. Augustine spent the majority of his youth away from the Lord in promiscuity and debauchery. If these people can become saints, then we too can be forgiven and grow in holiness. Let us not strive to be the best sinners, rather let us strive to be the best penitents so as to experience the mercy of God.